• Home
  • Books
    • Print Books
  • Siobhan's Blog
    • #ThursThreads Challenge
    • Giveaways
    • Book Gratitude
  • TLB Store
  • Contact
    • Newsletter
    • The ARCtic Circle
  • About Siobhan
    • #FlashFiction Awards
  • WIP News
  • Blog Tours
  • Privacy Policy
  Paranormal & Dauntless Romance from Siobhan Muir

Wednesday Randomness - Lying to Yourself

3/21/2018

 
Picture
Today's random Wednesday topic is: Name one thing you've lied to yourself about. Why did you do this?

I'm pretty honest with myself:
"No, I don't look awesome in those lacy negligees, I'm not size 2."
"No, I can't become a Navy SEAL, and honestly don't want to."
"No, I don't want to go jogging even if I need to."
"No, eating the last cookie isn't a great idea when I'm pre-diabetic."
"Yes, I have to do the taxes on time."
"Yes, I have to make the kid's school play costume."
"Yes, I have to do the dishes if I want to eat."
"Yes, I am going to learn the violin."

See? Honest. I really can't think of anything I've lied to myself about. Hoped, maybe, or told myself I'd do someday and changed my mind, but lied? Not that I recall. Lying doesn't make me feel good and I try to avoid things that don't feel good, with the exception of running on my elliptical, which I do for health reasons.

But after thinking about it, I realized one thing I have lied to myself about: How much/little my father's words about my appearance have bothered me. When I was about thirteen, just starting to develop, he'd say things like, "Well you really need to have 'hangers' to wear a tube top" and "You know, only women who've had kids have fat on their bellies." Really nice things to say to a young girl. /sarcasm

I told myself as I got older that it didn't mean anything to me anymore, and I was over it. But those comments still come up in my memory from time to time, and they hurt, even now when I have 'hangers' (that my husband likes very much) and am a mother of two (with even more belly fat). I suppose my father's nasty words shaped the person I am, but the lie is that it never bothered me. It did, and evidently, it still does a little. But now that I'm aware of it, maybe I can work through the unease, and figure out how to dismantle the hurt and like myself despite his words. :)

There you have it. Is there something you've lied to yourself about? Check out the other authors and what they had to say.
  • Bronwyn Green
  • Gwendolyn Cease
Gwen Cease
3/21/2018 07:31:48 am

My mom did the same thing to me. I loved her, but the constant weight comments got to be too much.

Siobhan Muir
3/21/2018 07:53:02 am

You know, my mom did too, but for some reason I could let hers go as something she was worried about for herself. My father's were too much for me to brush off. Interestingly, he apologized some years ago for the "mean" things he'd said to me. He said he didn't remember what he'd said, but he did remember being mean, and he was sorry. I was grateful for the apology, but I'm still not over the hurt.

Maureen O. Betita
3/21/2018 01:22:04 pm

I've recently accepted that the lack of overt support for my writing, from my family, really does bother me. They don't diss it...but I don't feel support from them. The husband supports...but at the same time, he's only read one of my myriad of titles.

It bugs me. And I'm finally accepted that it bugs me. It doesn't cripple me.

Is it sad I find myself not truly expecting anything more?

Siobhan Muir
3/21/2018 02:21:59 pm

You know, I'm the same. Mr. SM is a huge fan and believer, but my folks...they don't really see it as a viable career. I don't think it's sad that you aren't expecting more. I think that frees you from needing it as much, and might actually help strengthen you, Maureen.

Pansy Petal
3/21/2018 06:29:43 pm

Oh that little voice in the head that sounds like a parent. That is a hard one to let go. I have been working on that one for a long time. It took me years to even figure out why I was so angry all the time. Still a work in progress. But yeah! Easy one to lie to one self about.

Bronwyn Green link
3/22/2018 09:03:43 am

I'm so sorry. Those kinds of comments are so hurtful, and they live forever in our minds. *HUGS*

Miranda Kate
3/22/2018 10:43:19 am

Any comment that you find yourself brushing away (in your head when you repeat it endlessly to yourself as a sort of self torture) saying 'I don't care' to, is usually something that bothers you. I lie to myself a lot that way.

The biggest lie? (cuz I lie to myself a lot, trying to get myself to do things I don't really want to do but I feel I 'have' to do for others - all my life) That would be I wanted to move to this country and this village. I didn't. I really didn't. I lied to myself by telling myself I was running out of time to find someone to settle down with, and that I could do it for this man. That he would be a great father & husband (he is a great dad). I mean I did do it - so I 'could' do it - but I told myself it was what I wanted and it was good for me. That was the lie. It's hard living a lie like that, for so many years (16 years and still counting). It drives you to the brink (breakdown 2008) and you can't backtrack so easy once you have 2 kids in the mix and no job. So 16 years on I am learning how to stop lying to myself and be honest with myself about how I feel - listen to my feelings and trust/believe/support them. And not do things I don't want to do because I think someone else is more important. But it's tough.

M xx


Comments are closed.
    Please note this blog contains 18+ content.
    Picture

    About Me

    Siobhan Muir lives in Cheyenne, Wyoming, and writes kick-ass adventure with hot sex for men and women to enjoy. She believes in happily-ever-after, redemption, and communication, all of which you'll find in her romance stories of all genres.

    Picture
    Available now!
    Picture
    Available Now
    Picture
    Home of #ThursThreads #flashfiction
    Picture
    Feb 2019
    Picture
    Burning Yuletide
    Take the Reins
    Bronco's Rough Ride

    Links to find Siobhan Muir

    Facebook
    Twitter
    Pinterest
    Tumblr
    Amazon
    All Author
    Goodreads
    Authorgraph
    Three Lakes Books
    Picture
    Picture
    Picture

    Categories

    All
    Anniversary Celebration
    Anthology
    Bad Boys Of Beta Squad
    BDSM
    Best & Worst
    Bikers
    Blog Hop
    Book Spotlight
    Books Worth Your Bucks
    Callowwood-pack-series
    Cloudburst Colorado
    Contemporary Romance
    Cover Reveal
    Cover-reveal
    Cowboy Romance
    Dauntless Romance
    Dauntless-tuesdays
    Dragon Shifters
    Fantasy
    Fantasy-romance
    Femdomme
    Firefighter Romance
    First Person
    #flashfiction
    Giveaways
    Historical-romance
    Holiday Romance
    Hotsealskw
    Hot Teddy Bear Hero
    Humor
    Lgbt-romance
    Mayseptember-romance
    Menage-romance
    Mid-week-tease
    Military Romance
    Mystery
    Nanowrimo
    New Release
    Paranormal Romance
    Photo Fiction
    Promptly Penned
    Rainbow-snippets
    Recipe-for-romance
    Romantic Suspense
    Science-fiction
    Second-chance-series
    Snippet Sunday
    Song Fiction
    The-ivory-road-serial
    Thoughts And Opinions
    #ThursThreads
    Top Ten
    Triple-star-ranch-series
    Ultimate Recon
    Vampires
    Warbler Peninsula Series
    Werewolves
    Wild Words Weds
    Winners
    Wordless Wednesday
    Writing Challenge

    Archives

    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015

    RSS Feed

    Picture
    Writing partner and critic, Hobbes.
    Picture
    Advice from a Horse.
    Picture
    Favorite Coffee Shirt
Home
About
Newsletter

Word of Advice
If you want to be a writer, don't think about writing or talk about writing; WRITE. And never give up on the stories.